


The Way You Left Me

by PlayerOneMell



Category: Be More Chill
Genre: Angst, Anxiety, Flashabacks, Fluff, M/M, MICHAEL WAKES UP, Super memory
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-06
Updated: 2018-03-06
Packaged: 2019-03-27 23:13:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,422
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13891161
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PlayerOneMell/pseuds/PlayerOneMell
Summary: “Let’s kill those creeps!” Jeremy exclaims.Michael quickly gasps for air. This isn’t fair…this isn’t fair he has to deal with this. He zones out letting the flashback encompass him. He's taken out of true reality and placed in somewhere much worse. A memory. A memory that he's tried time and time again to erase.





	The Way You Left Me

Michael suffers from a super memory that makes him sound almost like a robot or something. Michael Mell has hyperthymesia, which makes him never forget anything that’s ever happened. Sometimes he will have flashbacks without warning. It’s both a blessing yet a curse. Michael hasn’t had a flashback for about two months now, which is great considering they usually are heinous little memories. 

“I’m on my way home from work Jer. I promise I’ll be at the house in two minutes.” Michael sighs getting into his PT Cruiser.   
“Can the car make it through the snow?” Jeremy asks.   
“Hell yeah! It got me this far hasn’t it?” Michael laughs. “See you soon baby.” Michael hands up the phone. 

Michael drives down the street cautiously as the snow brushes gently against the windows of his lovely car. He remembers when it snowed like this. His and Jeremy’s fourth date. Michael pulls over to the side of the road feeling a flashback coming on. 

~

Michael strapped on his skates with delight and pulled Jeremy onto to the ice with excitement. Jeremy and Michael had of course been ice skating before; only when they were little kids. Jeremy was never good at it. 

“Come on Jer. It’s not that hard.” Michael said skating backwards.   
“I don’t know Mikey.” Jeremy said with his legs being shaken every which way.   
“Just glide with me.” Michael said calmly pulling Jeremy forward. 

The boys had a fun time, but Jeremy did end up cutting his lip on the ice. Michael kept Jeremy up for the most part. Jeremy learned to skate on his own. Now every year the boys go ice skating before the holiday season really gears up.

~

Michael sighs and next to him he hears his phone ring. He picks up quickly noticing it’s Jeremy. Jeremy is clearly a little panicked. 

“Michael? Where are you?” Jeremy asks.   
“Ugh…I’m like two blocks away.” Michael says almost in a grumpy tone. “Why?”  
“Because it’s been fifteen minutes since you’ve left work. What happened?” 

Michael doesn’t know what to say. Jeremy knows how bad Michael’s memory gets, but this was good! Michael takes a deep breath and pulls back onto the road. 

“I had a flashback.”   
“Michael…what happened?”  
“Our third date, ice skating?” Michael smiles and he knows Jeremy can tell. “You cut your lip.”   
“Yeah…” Jeremy sighs. “That’s good Mikey. I’m happy it was a good one.”   
“Me too.” Michael hangs up as he walks through the door. 

Jeremy smiles and he shows Michael the pizza and wings he’s ordered. Michael chuckles. Michael is more of the cook in this relationship, and sometimes Jeremy just has a hard time trying. 

“Glad to see you’re home.” Jeremy smiles putting the phone down.  
“Glad to be home.” Michale walks over to Jeremy, grabbing him by the waist. “Glad to see you.” Michael pecks at Jeremy’s lips. 

Michael has had quite the day at work, and wants nothing but to relax with Jeremy. However, Michael can feel the gears in his head turning. Jeremy has to be careful with his words. 

“How was the drive beside the pulling over?”  
Michael blinks seeing himself driving. “It was good.” Michael says opening his eyes.   
“Your mind is working real hard isn’t it?” Jeremy asks.   
“Well, the only way to get rid of it is sleep deprivation and you know it.” Michael smirks grabbing a loganberry from the fridge. “It’ll all work out.” 

Michael is a little confident with his memory today. Sometimes he’s rather shy with it, but he’s remembering all good things. The boys sit down for pizza and wings. 

“You’re very happy.”   
“You make me happy.” Michael smiles sitting down at the table.   
“What did I ever do to deserve you?” Jeremy asks playfully. 

It might’ve been asked playfully, but it triggers something inside of Michael. Before he can bite into his hot buffalo wing he pauses and stares down at the table bracing himself for the flashes of memories he’s about to experience. 

~

Jeremy sobbed into Michael’s sweatshirt. He had only been a month without SQUIP. He was frantically apologizing for what he did to Michael. 

“I didn’t mean to! I hurt you and I’m sorry.” Jeremy screamed into Michael’s shoulder.   
“It’s okay buddy, I know, I know.” Michael said as he stroked Jeremy’s hair. 

The words soothed Michael. He knew Jeremy was hurting. He held the pale boy close to him. 

“Jeremy, it wasn’t you. And if it was it’s all forgiven.”   
“What did I do to deserve you?” Jeremy cried.   
“You’re perfect…if anything I don’t deserve you.” Michael sighed. 

~

“Michael?”   
“What?” Michael says looking Jeremy with a single tear rolling down his face.   
“Did you just have a flashback? That’s two…in only a few minutes.”   
“That happens sometimes.” Michael says embarrassed. “I was hoping you wouldn’t notice.” He smiles at Jeremy. 

Jeremy laughs noticing Michael is still happy and hoping it stays this way for awhile. It did, throughout dinner. Michael didn’t let his thoughts consume him. Jeremy is still worrying he might slip into another flashback. They can be time consuming and Michael isn’t aware of what happens to him when it’s happening. 

“Wanna play some games or do you have to do some work?” Jeremy asks taking their plates into the kitchen.   
“All my essays are written. So, why not bash some zombie heads?” Michael laughs following Jeremy into the basement.   
“I hate those zombies.”  
“Let’s kill those creeps!” Jeremy exclaims.

Michael quickly gasps for air. This isn’t fair…this isn’t fair he has to deal with this. He zones out letting the flashback encompass him.

~

“He went crazy trying to get it out!” Michael shouted in Jeremy’s face with intensity with the hope he’d realize what that computer could do to his head.   
“Then I’ve got nothing to worry about…why would I want that?” Jeremy scoffed.

He tried to make his way to the door, but Michael blocked him from leaving. Michael just wanted to protect Jeremy. Michael refused to move so Jeremy could get the picture. 

“Move it.” Jeremy hissed at Michael.   
“Or you’ll what?” Michael asked, he honestly wanted to know. 

There was a silence that in reality only lasted a few seconds, but to Michael it felt like years passed in that bathroom. In that silence. Jeremy locked eyes with Michael. It wasn’t Jeremy’s ocean blue full of light eyes, they were glazed over like he wasn’t Jeremy anymore. 

“Get out of my way, loser.” He said. 

Michael moved out of the way. As Jenna Roland pounded on the door and he shouted about being on his period, the panic took over Michael’s body. It was a hell for Michael. 

~

“Michael! Michael! I promise you’re not a loser, I’d never call you that again.” Jeremy says.

Michael is lying on the ground; cold and shaking on the ground recalling the memories too vividly. Jeremy scoops Michael into his arms. They had been fine for 2 weeks, and now suddenly said something out of line. He never means to trigger the memories. 

“Michael, please listen to me baby. I love you so much. I will never call you that ever again.” Jeremy holds Michael close to his chest.   
“I know.” Michael rubs his tears away. “I didn’t mean to.”   
“I know you didn’t. You never do.”  
“I just get the feelings back. I know you’ll never do that again. I just…I just…I just..” Michael’s panic from that night comes back to haunt him. 

Michael pulls Jeremy into his arms instead and holds Jeremy closely as he has a break down. Jermey listens to how quickly Michael’s heart is pumping blood. Jeremy lays down quickly and pulls Michale into his chest. Michael listens to Jeremy’s breathing and tries to match. 

“I”m sorry you have to watch me like this.” Michael sighs.   
“I’m sorry you have to deal with this.” Jeremy responds kissing Michael’s head.  
“I love you…please never leave me.”  
“I love too much. It’ll hurt to watch myself walk away. I will never leave you Michael.” Jeremy sighs. 

The boys fell asleep on the bean bag. In the future Michael still recalls the bathroom clearly, but he can also remember the good times equally as well. Like the mornings the boys wake up in each other’s arms and wake each other up wth a tender kiss. Everyday is good with Jeremy to help him. Michael loves Jeremy so much, even with the painful memories. Jeremy makes sure he doesn’t have anymore painful ones to relive.

**Author's Note:**

> Pardon those typos :P


End file.
